martedì 19 agosto 2008

Formica and the last thought

Formica was there, sitting on the sand, a couple of metres away from the water coming and going regularly with a fresh smell of salt.
She was sitting with her arms strongly held around her legs, staring at the dark line dividing the sea from the sky, waiting for an answer.
Thinking. She was thinking in English, because she wanted a good reason for hadn’t been understood.
Don’t you understand me? No? That’s right, perhaps it’s ‘couse of my English.

Formica, she went there by night because she wanted no light shining over the water leaving her body to drop sadly down the sand. Nobody could see her.
Can you see the pain in my face? No? That’s right, perhaps it’s because it’s too dark in here.

She was watching every day, like many movies she has learnt by heart, trying to find a way to escape, jumping over the barbed wire of time.
And while thinking she pulled out a paper and read those words, wondering why something that once is so certain, vanishes into the nothing without any good reason.

“Are you coming with me?
No, I can’t and I don’t want.

Why?
There’s a sun shining into my heart, complicated, confused, but He started shinig out of my will, I had little control upon it.

Are you sure this is a true light?
No, I’m not, you know, I’m never sure about something. I fear so I don’t trust. I don’t trust so I always deal with my uncertain balance.

Does he know you are so special and…so fragile?
I hope he will.”

And she read again the choice she made many months ago. Was it right? Was it good?
She thought it was, she thought it was something good.

Does he know you are so special and…so fragile? I don’t know.